Okay. I knew this would be hard. I knew it would be near impossible. Meredith Fleming is as sensible and stable and sweet as they come, and she would never be the kind of girl to just leap back into my tainted and dangerous and heavily tatted arms.

Which is exactly why I want her back so badly.

And okay, maybe that initial reunion didn’t go exactly as well as it had in my mind, but I can still save this. I can make this happen. I have to make this happen, and I won’t give up until she’s mine.

“Do you want something to drink?” I ask as she slowly sits back down at the kitchen table. A small, tiny, baby step in the right direction.

“Yeah. Vodka. Straight,” Meredith says dryly, her enormous, innocent hazel eyes looking up at me, flooding me with memories of the past.

“I assume you’re kidding,” I answer, a hint of playfulness in my voice.

“Wow. You really do remember me. Yes, kidding.”

I smile and sit back down at the table, just so relieved that she didn’t get in her car and drive away. Because she wanted to. And she still wants to. But…she’s here. And I have to make the most of that.

“Look, Zachary…” Meredith shakes her head, her cheeks rosy from sunlight and…shock, probably. “You’ve always been a charmer, and I see that hasn’t changed. But, I really can’t—”

“Meredith.” I sit down across from her, holding her gaze with as much intensity as I feel burning in my chest. “Last year, I had a casual, fling sort of thing with a woman in Las Vegas.”

She narrows her eyes and her jaw falls open with shock and disgust. “Wow. You are not off to a great start.”

“Just…” I hold up a hand, cringing because I know how it sounds. But I need to tell her the story, and I have to include the whole truth. How else would I ever get her to trust me again? “Just let me tell you this, okay?”

“Okay. So, you were sleeping with a stranger. Please continue.” She wrinkles her nose.

“Anyway, this woman was…a mistake. She ended up getting pregnant.”

Meredith gasps sharply, her hand flying to her mouth. “Holy crap. Zachary. Is it…are you…”

“No, I’m not a father. The baby…wasn’t mine.” I wince a little, not loving having to relive this particularly bitter memory.

“Wait…” She shakes her head, and I give her a second to process all of this.

“I know it’s a lot.”

“So, she got pregnant with…someone else?” She cocks her head, as if innocent mind can hardly handle this.

She’s too good for this world.

“Yes. She did.” I nod, taking a breath as I continue the story. “But she thought it was mine. Or thought it might be mine. And decided that she was going to basically come after everything I have.”

“Oh. Oh man.”

“So, I got my lawyers involved, we had a non-invasive prenatal paternity test conducted, and…lo and behold, I was not the father. So after a pretty grueling and stressful few months, the whole thing disappeared.”

“Okay…well that’s good, at least.” Meredith lifts a slender shoulder, her eyes wide as she takes all of this in. “That sounds really messy. I’m sorry.”

“It’s all good. It happened, and it worked out for the best.”

“But, um…” She runs a hand through those soft, brown waves, tilting her chin up to meet my gaze. “I don’t really understand what all of this has to do with me.”

I sit up straight, looking at her intently. “Look, Mer. It was a wakeup call. A huge, massive, eye-opening wakeup call that sort of…freaked me out.”

“But, why? You weren’t the father, so…you’re good. You’re off the hook, right?”

“Yeah, sure, I guess. But, I don’t know. The whole thing…the whole situation…the idea of maybe, possibly having a child, it was like reality crashed into me like a semi-truck. I realized that…I’m almost twenty-nine, and I have…no one.”

Meredith gives a wry laugh. “You have an army of obsessed fans.”

“I don’t have a family, Mer. When I thought that there might be a chance that I was going to become a father…you want to know the craziest thing about it? I was, almost, like, the littlest bit excited. Isn’t that messed up?” I laugh and shake my head. “Because even if the mom was a bit of a wackjob, I would have someone who was my real family. I would have a kid who was mine, someone who actually mattered to me on a deep level. When everything went down, I just realized how much I missed that. How much I need that. How my entire life has become one empty, soulless void.”

She just stares back at me, her doe-eyes blinking with surprise and maybe the smallest bit of…understanding? God, I hope so.

“I mean that’s very…” She chews her lip and processes this for a second. “Poetic and…tender of you. But, Zachary, I…I still don’t understand…”

“And my mind and my heart just always went back to you. I realized that there was no more time to waste, and you’re the only person I’ve ever been able to see a real future with. The only person who truly made me want to be better.”

Meredith leans back in the chair, looking as if her head is spinning. I can’t say I blame her. “I know this is a lot to take in.”

“Zach.” She swallows and steadies her gaze. “Look at you. You’re a famous rock star with long hair and tattoos and a reputation that terrifies me. I’m…”

“A gorgeous, sweet, wonderfully rule-following perfectionist. I know.”

“I’m just a girl from your past. Who…you hurt.”

“And all I want to do is make up for that.”

She bunches up her hair with her hands and groans. “Zachary Thorne. This is insanity. Pure insanity.”